Bad Golf’s John Robins: “My goal for 2022 is to become a bigger boy”

Bad Golf's John Robins has signed up for a golf fitness course to gain yards.

John Robins is looking to build on his meteoric progress in 2021 by adding some ‘big boy’ power to his game.

In his exclusive Today’s Golfer column, the award-winning comedian and 5live host runs us through his new, deep-seated quest for some added yardage. 

What’s your golf goal for 2022? As I said in last month’s column, winter is a time when the range can be more welcoming than the course, and an ideal time to assess your game, ride out the initial inconsistency brought about by a swing change, a new grip, or even new clubs. Are you making changes for next year? I am.

When Alex Horne and I started our YouTube channel Bad Golf in 2019 we were truly bad. Not just bad at golf but also very new to the experience of playing on golf courses. I remember our first round together when the opportunity to use the air gun to clean our shoes was a genuine thrill, and not the post-round pain in the behind it is now!

One thing we were not quite prepared for though, is how intimidating it was playing in front of (and it was always in front of!) proper golfers. The sort of guy who can make you top your drive just by standing politely to one side as you tee off. The type of player who, after you offer to let them play though, just launches their ball into space or to the heart of the green, before disappearing into the distance. That’s right… bigger boys.

We called them ‘bigger boys’ because it so encapsulated the mixture of awe and dread in which we held them. To us beginners they weren’t just a different league, they were a whole different sport. Confident, strong, and always with a perfectly timed quip as they steamrollered past. “There’s only six more hours of daylight lads, good luck!” or “hope you’ve brought your waders!”. That kind of thing.

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Last year’s goal, for me, was to play off an eighteen handicap, and by May I had achieved this, peaking at 12.3. I’ve struggled to play to it since but am levelling off at about 14.5 which I think I’ll be able to maintain. However, I still look at the swings of people around my level and feel there’s a big gulf between them and me.

My drives average a pretty paltry 217yrds, I take about one divot per annum and I’ve been known to leave an eight iron short on a 120-yard par 3. So, my golfing aim for 2022, is… to become a bigger boy.

I don’t mean I want to intimidate other golfers, or make people nervous when I watch. Far from it. I always want to make people feel golf is welcoming to them, regardless of their ability. In fact, true bigger boys don’t actively do anything to intimidate, it’s just something about them that makes your knees turn to jelly when they’re eight minutes early to the 1st and watch you struggle to get the ball to sit on the tee (why is that?!)

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What I mean is I want to get a bit of power into my shots. I want to take divots like beaver pelts, and I want to say “160 yards to the front, probably a 7-iron”.

Now, I know that’s what we all want. And for so long I’ve focused on accuracy over distance, slowing my swing down to hit more fairways than I miss, but I’m 39, still relatively young, and am regularly outdriven by golfers twenty years older than me (and, in one exceptional example at my club, a golfer well over twice my age). Therefore I think it’s time to add a bit of power. Get that torso up to scratch and turn my swing into something resembling a bouncer trying to break down a door as opposed to a clown struggling to keep juggling balls in the air.

How do I plan to go about my Bryson-esque quest? Well, I’ve signed up for a ‘golf fitness’ course.

It’s a big step for someone whose idea of fitness is walking to Tesco. And I’m hoping that seeing exercise in terms of my swing will give me the motivation to do something I’ve never done before… go to a gym. But hopefully by next summer my golfing aim for 2022 will have come true, and I will finally be able out drive an 85-year-old.

RELATED: How Bryson DeChambeau builds his bag

WITB: Bad Golf’s John Robins

Click the club names to read reviews and tests of John’s clubs

Driver: Cobra King RadSpeed Loft: 10.5º set to 11.5º. Shaft: Tensei blue 65 reg

Hybrid: Cobra King Speedzone Loft: 2H. Shaft: Recoil reg

Irons: Cobra King Speedzone Lofts: 5-GW. Shafts: Recoil reg

Wedges: Cobra King MIM Lofts: 52º, 58º. Shafts: STD wedge shaft

Putter: Odyssey O-Works 2.0 R-Line

Golf ball: Bridgestone E6

Apparel: Puma

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About the Author

John Robins is an award-winning stand-up comedian, BBC Radio 5Live presenter, host of the Moon Under Water podcast and, alongside Alex Horne, one half of Bad Golf. 
Download John’s 5Live show with Elis James here, and the Moon Under Water podcast, here. You can also follow John on Twitter and Instagram.
For more from Bad Golf, subscribe to their YouTube channel or follow on Twitter and Instagram.